Monday, April 9, 2007

Everyone's Getting Rich Off Sanjaya

... except us (but we are having fun)! Yes, you already know about VotefortheWorst.com, but did you know now there's a VoteAgainsttheWorst.com? The purpose of the former is to elect Sanjaya Malakar American Idol, the purpose of the latter, well, of course, to get him eliminated.

The Against's site home page states:

"So Stephanie Edwards was voted off of American Idol just shy of being in the top ten. It's not exactly a travesty... she wasn't going to win anyway. But, she did have talent. It's ridiculous that she's gone, considering the people that are still on the show competing. Namely, Sanjaya Malakar. When Ryan said "You're Safe" to Sanjaya, my boyfriend jumped off the couch and held his hands up in despair. He vows not to watch the show again (until next week, of course). I'm tired of sites like "VoteFORtheWorst" that encourage people to vote for the bad contestants just to be amusing. So, I thought I'd start my own site. My site will encourage people to vote AGAINST the bad people by voting FOR all of the others! If we can spread the word to organize our voting, we just might be able to make this American Idol results show filled with a little more integrity. Imagine the joy you'll feel knowing that the right people are going home each week! I've devised a plan for true fans of the show to actually control the voting outcome. The solution is to form an Alliance. Think how great it worked for Richard Hatch on Survivor. (Though, hopefully, I won't be doing jail time any time soon.) Joining forces and creating a pattern of organized voting is the only way we're going to defeat them.

"And here is their "Plan" for this week:

"The Plan for next week (4/10/07) has been published!It's very simple, really. Who do we want to get rid of? Sanjaya Malakar!! The only way to vote AGAINST one person is to actually vote FOR all of the other contestants. That means that we have to organize a way to make sure enough votes come in for the people we want to stay. Think that's impossible? I have a plan! Here's how it works:

"Now with Gina Glocksen gone {sob, sob}, there are 7 contestants remaining that we want to make sure get enough votes to stay around. Everyone should continue voting for their favorite contestant each week, as they normally would, but we're going to add an extra step. Let's split up the country geographically to make sure that each of these 7 contestants is accounted for. Every state sponsers one contestant. If you live in that state, vote for your favorite contestant, but also vote for your assigned contestant. This way, each sponsored candidate will get more votes than they would otherwise have received. Find your state below to see who you should vote for come Tuesday night. Then, tell everyone you know to get on the bandwagon! (Tell your friends and coworkers, call radio stations, hang fliers ... anything you can think of!)

"Here are the state assignments per the site:
Melinda Doolittle: Alaska, California, Colorado, Delaware Population: 42,304,509

"Haley Scarnato: Idaho, Indiana, Kansas, Louisiana, Minnesota, Montana, New Hampshire, North Dakota, Ohio, Virginia Population: 42,015,977

"Lakisha Jones: Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, Florida, Kentucky, Maryland, New Mexico Population: 42,768,295

"Jordin Sparks: Hawaii, Massachusetts, Nebraska, Oregon, Pennsylvania, South Dakota, Utah, Washington, West Virginia, Wisconsin Population: 42,389,730

"Blake Lewis: Iowa, Maine, Mississippi, New Jersey, New York, Rhode Island, Tennessee Population: 42,240,630

"Sanjaya Malakar: No State Sponsorship!

"Phil Stacey: Michigan, Oklahoma, South Carolina, Texas, Vermont, Washington D.C., Wyoming Population: 42,466,660

"Chris Richardson: Connecticut, Georgia, Illinois, Missouri, Nevada, North Carolina
Population: 42,244,603

"Population source: www.infoplease.com

"*It's been pointed out to me that I did not include DC or the US territories, who also have the ability to vote. Let's go ahead and let people that live in those areas vote for HALEY, since she has the least amount of assigned votes. Sound good? :-)Now, get out there and spread the word! Tell anyone who will listen to unite and vote for their sponsored candidate. The bigger we can make this movement, the better our chances for making this a good race for the American Idol title."

And like every good cause, the site sells merch (T-shirts, sweatshirts, bags, hats, buttons, mugs mousepads, magnets and even dog shirts), though we're not sure what worthy cause this is going to except to line the Web site creator's pockets. (Note, VFTW also sells tons of merch).

However, we did find a useful link on the site to On Camera Audiences, where you can apply for tickets to American Idol, as well as a host of other shows.

IF SANJAYA WINS

But you know, we've decided that this thing has less to do with Sanjaya winning American Idol than how, like the Idol producers, everyone else can make money or notoriety off of him. When the Sanjaya publicity storm eventually dies down, what will happen to Web sites such as If Sanjaya Wins, which asks readers to write in what they will do if Sanjaya wins, but also sells a slew of both pro and anti-Sanajaya merch, including T-shirts, buttons, caps, bears, bags and bumper stickers.

The site's founder grades the "If Sanjaya Wins" oaths. Some of our favorites:

From Borat from Kazakstan:
If Sanjaya wins, we think great success!! In my country, we love Miss Sanjaya... we will praise her beautiful voice and her beautiful hair. VERY NICE!!!
IfSanjayaWins.com Rating: A+

Brandon from Cincinnati, Ohio:
If Sanjaya wins, Stevie Wonder will wish he was deaf too.
IfSanjayaWins.com Rating: B

Kate from Kennedale, Texas:
If Sanjaya wins, I will go to that little blonde girl's house and cry with her.
IfSanjayaWins.com Rating: B+

Anthony from Chicago:
If Sanjaya wins, I will renounce my homosexuality, vote conservative Republican, listen to Rush Limbaugh every day for the rest of my life, marry a sweet, young southern baptist girl and move to Arkansas to raise our family in a trailer park.
IfSanjayaWins.com Rating: B

Kevin Covais from Levittown, New York:
If Sanjaya wins, I will know for sure that I was robbed of my well deserved victory.
IfSanjayaWins.com Rating: A-

The site also thanks all the media outlets that have given it publicity and are making its owner rich, which now, unfortunately, includes us!

A SANJAYA MOVIE?

TMZ.com reports TMZ.com reports that a Hollywood independent comedy production company is searching for a Sanjay-alike -- no talent required. The company posted an ad on Craigslist, asking individuals to submit headshots and their MySpace link to be eligible for an audition. The ad says: "Independent Comedy production company seeking a Sanjaya look-alike for an American Idol parody - the auditions may possibly be filmed by a national television news show. Whoever gets the part will star in our spoof. Lots of exposure for the actors auditioning. Don't worry if your hair isn't long, we will get a wig for you. Don't worry if you can't sing, after all, it's Sanjaya."

ROSE MCGOWAN, SANJAYA SUPPORTER

While Ryan Seacrest might be rooting for Jordin Sparks to become the next Americn Idol, feisty actress Rose McGowan revealed that Sanjaya's her "American Idol" pick -- because "he's horrible!" McGowan was spotted at LAX, where some paps confused the clad-in-black starlet for Angelina Jolie, which amused the lighthearted Rose. When asked if she was into "Idol," she confessed that she wants the "Indian kid" to win this season of "Idol," loving him because "he's horrible, he's great." Her advice to Sanjy: "Keep on keepin' on with your bad voice and hair, America loves it."

SANJAYA SAFE THIS WEEK?

We think so, especially if sings Ricky Martin's "Shake Your Bon-Bon." Can't you picture him singing that? We can.

SEEING IS NOT BELIEVING

... Not in a world that has software that will let you alter any image. TMZ.com also revealed that a picture floating around the Internet (including this site) purporting to show Blake Lewis sitting in Chris Richardson's lap was a cleverly done Photoshop job combining two separate pieces from one photo. "Chris Richardson and Blake Lewis are close friends on "Idol," but they probably aren't this close. The fake photo has been making the Internet rounds, but the original was taken backstage at "American Idol" on February 20. If the people behind the doctored photo wanted people to believe it was real, using Sanjaya might have been more convincing!"

TAYLOR'S TOUR

As we reported previously, this weekend we went to see Taylor Hicks in concert, and without prejudice we have to say that it was the most energized show that we have ever seen. Petite New York singer Toby Lightman, who has a great, pure voice did an enjoyable 40-minute opening set including many numbers available on her CD "Bird on a Wire."

Once Hicks hit the stage, he did a continuous 80 minutes, giving a manic, even frenzied, concert to a screaming and cheering sold-out arena. He sang nearly his entire new release, plus a couple of numbers from one of his previous CDs and a few numbers that are on neither. He was in great voice, especially considering he rarely took a second for a breather. We're actually surprised that he has only lost 30 pounds on tour -- and yes he is definitely svelter than his Idol days -- because he never stops moving onstage, whether he is singing, playing guitar, harmonica, tambourine or cowbell. Dressed in jeans, a shirt and sport jacket, he is in constant motion, pogoing and dancing, playing to the left, right and center of the stage. His band was fantastic and as equally energized as he was.

The only strange thing we noted is that Hicks seems to get into a zone when he performs, cutting off everything but his intense concentration on the music. Though he gave a couple of requisite "Soul Patrol" shoutouts, and a quick wave to a group of girls who ran down to the stage, it felt very scripted and there was otherwise very little interaction with the audience. We don't think he spoke more than 50 words during the entire set, though girls were constantly screaming "I Love You!" or "Marry Me!" The audience definitely wanted to interact with Hicks, but he kept a physical distance. And although we thoroughly enjoyed the show, we felt the same disconnect one might feel watching a performer on TV. From what we've heard Hicks is shy, and we can believe this watching him onstage, but we believe the same can be said for Chris Isaak whom we've seen in concert several times, yet he makes a concerted effort a few times during his shows to have a bit of audience give-and-take. Taylor would do well to follow his example. Here is a review of the show.

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