American Idol Season 8Wild Card Show Results

And here are the final 4 finalists. That's right, at the last minute (or so Simon Cowell said) they decided this year to have a Top 13 for the first time in the history of the show. Added tonight were:

Jasmine Murray
Megan Corkrey
Matt Giraud
Anoop Desai

Season 8 has officially become the worst year yet for "American Idol." The results of the Wild Card round were so obviously set up in advance, it was hard not to laugh out loud at the judges supposedly spontaneous comments. Instead of their critiques being accurate appraisals of the performances, they sounded like validations for decisions that had been made by the producers judges who knows how many days (weeks? months?) ago.

To begin with, everyone we knew said the three finalist seats would automatically go to Jasmine, Megan and Anoop. The producers judges had made it obvious in their remarks to these three after their group performances how much they liked them -- whether or not they sang well. And last night, the trio were far from the best singers. Ricky Braddy easily outsang Anoop, while like her or hate her (we tend to the latter), Tatiana Del Toro had the best female vocal of the evening. Yet the judges had to find ways to trash these interlopers, since they weren't preordained to go through. From Tatiana, they just wanted a final chance to get some drama. It was actually quite cruel, even for "Idol." They used and abused a mentally unstable person. Perhaps they were hoping another one of Paula's slavish devotees would commit suicide, this time right in front of her, on national TV. Now, wouldn't that have grabbed headlines?

As it was, they had to settle for the headline shocker of a Top 13. But how much of a shocker was it really? There have buzzes about that happening since January, when Fox reality chief Mike Darnell told TV Week in an exclusive interview, "There's a big surprise coming when we get to the Top 12, but I can't reveal it right now. It is something that will be talked about and is something I think that has some element of controversy surrounding it."

And, " ... it’s a long season and you want to keep as many surprises for the audience, for the press, for everybody, as you go along. Some controversies will pop out [Joanna Pacitti?]. But this is something that we sort of felt like, here’s one set of things we’re doing, we’re going to wait and give you the other set when we get to the final 12."

In the Jan. 18 interview, Darnell also said, "I think I have in my mind a Top 7 or 8."

Hmmm. It's almost as if "Idol" is proving what many of us have known believed for the longest time: that the show is entirely rigged and has nothing to do with "reality."

But Darnell, who strikes us as a burnt-out, inarticulate '80s drugger leaning hard on the Grecian Formula in this clip, got it wrong when he said, "It's not going to change what you think of American Idol [ha!] and we don't want to do that. This show is, you know, a phenomenon. It's American, it's apple pie. We're not changing the core of the show." Wrong! As cynical as we've always been about the "reality" of the show, it took this season to really turn us against it. We doubt anything they do for the finalist weeks can make us like it again.

Perhaps Entertainment Weekly's clever Michael Slezak said it best in this little ditty he wrote, sung to "Give Me One Reason." Kudos to you, Michael:

Give me one reason to stay tuned, and I'll watch the Wild Card show/
Give me one reason to stay tuned; quick, before my head explodes/
Yeah, since you screwed Felicia Barton/
You've got to make me change my mind

Kara, I got your number, you're a soulless corporate shill/
You gave props to Jasmine Murray, even though her voice is shrill/
Take your package artists, /
Back to where you came from,/
You are no Paula

Give me one reason to stay tuned, 'cause tonight's show really blew/
Give me one reason to stay tuned, Ju'Not Joyner where are you?/
Said I can't go on without Idol/
You've got to make me change my mind

I don't want no Tatiana, with her tears and crying fits/
I don't want no Tatiana, she's a mediocre ditz/
I just want some Mishavonna — how I love her voice to bits

Oh handsome Ricky Braddy, come and give us what we need/
And that redhead Jesse Langseth, well, she's a'ight I concede/
But if Matt Giraud sings Coldplay once again/
I suspect my ears will bleed

Give me one reason to stay tuned, 'cause this show has gone to poop/
Give me one reason to stay tuned, okay I'll tune in for Anoop/
I miss singers playing instruments/
You've got to make me change my mind

Here is the recap of Thursday's performances. All the numbers were preceded by a clip of each contestant paying obeisance and being obsequious to the judges for giving them another chance. It was all quite disgusting.

We knew Jesse Langseth was doomed when we saw she was up first. Although there is still something we like about her voice and open honesty, we were less than mesmerized by her performance of Rufus and Chaka Khan's "Tell Me Something Good." Yes, she raised the heat in the room with her facial expressions, body movements and mini (she has a wowsa pair of legs), but this just wasn't a great competition song. Instead of showing her range, which she talked about in her clip, for us it had the opposite effect. Randy Jackson calls it an interesting song choice, but isn't sure she sang it that well; Kara DioGuardi says Jesse had some notes that were not on key, but likes her "swagger" (there's that word again. Gee, maybe Jesse didn't "dirty it up" enough like Alexis Grace learned to do for the judges, sigh) and, pointing to the video screen, tells her she's not like the little girls in those "packages" (there's that word again, too), more like Sasha Fierce (what analogy would Kara have used if Beyoncé hadn't come up with this one?); Paula Abdul is impressed with her tenacity and determination and tells Jesse she has a lot of soul, but then declares "I can already tell it's going to be a hard night," which is a euphemism for, "Gee, I really didn't expect to like you so much, because you're not gonna get picked"; Simon reiterates that putting her into the Wild Card round was totally last minute (is that meant to be a compliment?), says he's glad they did, tells her she has a good voice, but then raps her with the song and performance were indulgent. It was all about you. Paula and Kara "fight" back saying it should be about her, it's a sexy song. Simon answers, "No tonight it's us, believe it or not, because we are the ones who are going to be voting you in." Ha! Liar!

Watch video of Jesse Langseth singing "Tell Me Something Good"

Matt Giraud says in his clip he wants to return to the bluesy sound that the judges originally liked him for. Dressed in Justin Timberlake style, he does a really nice job with the Jackson 5's "Who's Loving You." It was soooo much better than his Coldplay fiasco. Kara tells him he can riff amazingly, that it was a little bit over the top at points, but it was a great vocal; Paula tells him this was in the right zone, that the song was a perfect pick and that he did an amazing job and that there's no doubt that America is loving you right now (a euphemism for "It's in the bag, Matt. You made it."); Simon tells him he was a billion times better than last week and it was a great choice of song, but that he hates what Matt's wearing. What's worse for Simon, is that he saw "bits of Taylor Hicks coming through," and we all know how Simon despises Taylor. The audience boos; Randy puts the lock on it by saying, "You made everyone ... scared that you're going to maybe [maybe, ha!] enter this competition and give them a run for the money. That's how to sing. That's what I want."

Watch video of Matt Giraud singing "Who's Loving You"

Megan Corkrey proves once again that she's a very pretty girl who looks like Elaine Benes from "Seinfeld" when she tries to dance. She also proves that though she has a nice tone to her voice, she's not a very good singer. She unwisely chooses KT Tunstall's "Black Horse and the Cherry Tree," a song that Katharine McPhee just killed when she sang it. It only proved how weak Megan was in comparison. The producers judges have to be creative now, to convince us why they've already chosen her for the Top 12 when she just proved she doesn't belong there. Paula starts by telling her she looks beautiful, which as everybody knows is Paula's euphemism for "Your singing sucked." She also says, "You picked a song that fits your personality, so you picked the right song." It became laughable when she got to "And your real name's Joy, and you have a lot of joy up there," ending with "Overall, I think you picked the right song." Abdul never once mentions her singing. Ha! Simon, with a really robotic Muppet-like expression on his face says, "I've always liked you, and I still like you. I think you're terrific." Maybe we're watching too much "Lie to Me," but on terrific, his right eye blinked weirdly, indicating to us at least, that this was a bald-face lie. He then said, "What I like about you is that you are current, and sometimes this show can get a little karaoke. And I don't get that from you." As Randy would say, "Whaaaaaaat?" That's all you get from Megan. He adds, "It wasn't the best vocal we're ever going to hear, but it doesn't matter. It was terrific." This from the judge who always reminds everyone else that this is a singing competition, not a quirky or cute or nice competition. Randy agrees it wasn't the best vocal he ever heard, but it was the right song choice [not if she can't sing it, dude]; Kara locks it in with, "I think we need you because you give some variety to what's already up there [could she be any clearer that Megan's already been selected?] and I think America needs that choice. You're somebody different. ... And I hope you stay." They all mention she's quirky, but not one judge comments positively on the vocals. What a sham!

Watch video of Megan Corkrey singing "Black Horse and the Cherry Tree"

Von Smith was like a deer in the headlights on Elton John's "Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word." There were problems with the low register in the beginning, but it got much much better in the middle and soared by the end. But, of course, he was doomed before he started. Simon tells him the song didn't start well and that Von is beginning to become "a bit boring," too serious, too earnest; Randy agrees with Simon, but talks about the beautiful tone of Von's voice when he hit the middle notes, though he wasn't crazy about the song choice; Kara says the song got more than serious, it got BWAHAHAHA "dark." She then says Von has great vocal ability, that he has what it takes, but that he "hasn't dialed in yet." [whereas Megan could dial for the rest of her life and only get a busy signal] At this point, Von knows he's doomed and looks like he's going to cry any second. We felt really badly for him because it was all a lie, all a fix and had nothing to do with him. Paula tries to temper the negativity by telling him that when he focuses too much on the technical side of the song he doesn't let his real essence show, and when he does let it out "you soar, and take us all with you." She also tells him,"You have to count on the fact that you're a brilliant singer [but the producers don't want you]. You really are."

Watch video of Von Smith singing "Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word"

Jasmine Murray, a bright light at her audition but a disaster during the semifinals picks Christina Aguilera's "Reflection." Not only will Aguilera not lose sleep over this rendition, neither will Jordin Sparks (watch Jordin here) or Ayla Brown (here). Was it better than her last performance? Yup. Was it really good? No. Was it way too big for her voice? Absolutely. It had some moments, but just that. Nothing more. Randy tells her this was a big improvement, but that the song was too big for her and there were flat and sharp moments, but also some great bright spots. His biggest compliment was no compliment, "It was way better than the last time you sang." Kara says, "Actually, I didn't even know that you had that big of a voice [that's 'cause she doesn't]. "And now [now? now?] I'm starting to think she has a really big voice." Ha, Paula starts with, "You look lovely tonight and you picked a beautiful song." She continues, "There were some notes that fell off a little bit, but overall I felt you did a wonderful job." Lyin' Simon begins by telling Paula she's not giving Jasmine enough credit, starting a fake spat between the two. He then says, "That was pretty special compared to what we heard before." Yeah, well, mud is pretty special compared with turds. He then says, "It was a very, very brave song choice," but it sounded a little at times like a young girl trying to sound a little more grown up. And then came the tell: To a chorus of "yesses" from the other judges, Lyin' Simon says, "And I think you just put yourself back in the running."

Watch video of Jasmine Murray singing "Reflection"

Ricky Braddy did what he does best: He came, he sang, he conquered. Then he got shat on. Was Stevie Wonder's "Superstition" a surprising song choice, as all the judges kept reiterating? Yes? But did he pull it off? Unquestionably. That should only prove how talented he is, that he could pull off a song you'd never expect him to be able to. Plus, much to "Idol's" chagrin, he's an obvious crowd pleaser: There was a tremendous amount of shreiking and screaming before he even sang. Kara makes the stupidest statement ever, especially considering they're going to eliminate him in a few minutes: "Well, Ricky, you can sing your butt off. We knew that." She adds, tonight was about getting out there and showing us your personality. And you did that. Good job. [Er, yeah, so?] Paula agrees, saying, "I loved the way you loosened up ... You nailed it! You nailed it! And you had fun!" Simon and Randy, obviously elsewhere during the performance, didn't see it that way ['cause they weren't moving Ricky forward]. Simon tells Ricky he sounds good, but that when you're brought back at this stage of the competition you've absolutely have to say to us "You've got to put me into the competition because I'm a great vocalist, a great performer [HA! Like Megan and Jasmine just didn't?] He then calls Ricky's song and vocal karaoke, lightweight and clumsy. And the overt clue that Ricky was doomed in advance: "So I don't think you really made the impression you could have made there." Randy tells Ricky he thinks he really has a voice and can really blow, but the song wasn't quite the one for him. [Yeah, Randy, you just told Jasmine the same thing, and she's going through and without the vocal talent Ricky has.] Then he pulls a Simon and calls Ricky's song choice self-indulgent, a term Randy would never use. Sheesh.

Watch video of Ricky Braddy singing "Superstition"

Next up is what the producers hope will be the flaming burnout named Tatiana Del Toro. For whatever bizarre reason she had in her lil' puddinhead, Tatiana decides to sing Whitney Houston's "Saving All My Love for You" again. But this time, she blew the hell out of the song and sang it better than last time. Plus, she actually looked really nice. But she might as well have been wearing a target for the slings and arrows aimed in her direction. To begin with, when the camera panned to the judges' table while Tatiana was singing, it was clear they weren't even listening to her. In fact, Simon was playing his little torment games with Paula. When Tatiana stopped singing and they turned on the judges' mikes, the first thing we heard was Paula loudly saying to Simon, "Oh my god, stop that!" Paula starts the critiques, but Tatiana is talking more than Paula is, telling Abdul how much she loves her. Abdul is like the patron saint of the demented -- they all come seeking her out. But then, we guess it takes one to know one. Heh. Paula says she's not a fan of people who repeat songs, and that it started a little shaky, but then when Tatiana got into her "frikking" power voice, the judges all started looking and said, "Man, she can sing." Simon says, so what happens if you make it to the next round? You'll just sing the same song again? He then torments her over and over about why she's singing the same song and why she didn't pick another song. (Of course, 'cause the fix is in, five minutes later he doesn't ask Anoop the same questions after Anoop repeats his song.) Randy lies and says it started off really rough, adding there were some good moments and some not so good moments [as opposed to, hmmm, who? Megan? Who had only bad moments but will get chosen anyway?] Kara jumps in with, "It's like 'The Adventures of Tatiana,' I don't know what this is. Like today this is a new personality. Like who's this one? ... But at least she's not crying and holding her heart." Simon chimes in "She will, she will." [Enough already! We get it -- the real reason she's here is for the histrionics]. And, in fact, she does, when they tell her she hasn't made it.

Watch video of Tatiana Del Toro singing "Saving All My Love for You"

Last up is Anoop Desai, who may be the most popular contestant to not, yet, make the Top 12 13. He, like Tatiana, decides to sing a song he's done before: Bobby Brown's "My Perogative." And ya' know what? It's wasn't that great the first time, nor was it any better the second time. But who cares? What does that matter? It's all a game anyway. Simon tells Anoop he's like an enthusiastic dog (that's a compliment, right?), then says, "Again, not the best singer we're going to hear, but people like you. That's important." But Simon, as you've drummed into our heads, time and again, it's not a liking competition, it's a singing competition. Next came the evening's biggest tell of all: "I think one of the biggest jobs we have tonight is that we've got to 'cast' this next stage, you know, so we're not just going to put the good boring singers through, we've got to put some mediocre singers personality through, as well." Randy acknowledges that it's a song Anoop sang before, but lies and says it's better this time. "So I'm OK with people repeating songs, but you just got to slay it. And you slayed it." Not. Kara says, "This is the best you ever did it," adding that she wanted to get up and dance. Paula calls him a showman and tells him that he's "whipping out moves that are a little nasty there." She adds, "The truth is the producers everyone loved that performance." She does warn him "you need to be really careful in picking your songs" (Paula, do you know something we don't yet know? Like he'll be picking more songs? Ha!) and "For this one time I'm glad you went back and picked this song." Yeah, right.

Watch video of Anoop Desai singing "My Prerogative"

After that, the judges eliminated or put through the contestants.

Watch video of Wild Card judges' choices: Jasmine Murray, Ricky Braddy, Megan Corkrey, Tatiana Del Toro

Watch video of Wild Card judges' choices: Jesse Langseth, Von Smith, Matt Giraud, Anoop Desai

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© 2009

American Idol Season 8Top 36 Group 3 Results

The next three Season 8 finalists are:

Jorge Nuñez
Scott MacIntyre
Lil Rounds

These contestants will compete tomorrow night in the Wild Card show for one of the three remaining finalist spots:

Von Smith







Jasmine Murray







Ricky Braddy







Megan Corkrey







Tatiana del Toro







Matt Giraud







Jesse Langseth







Anoop Desai







We felt angry and frustrated after Wednesday's show. We really hate the format changes this season. In an attempt to boost flagging ratings, the producers are taking steps that are alienating core viewers, ultimating losing more viewers (and ratings) as the travesty they call Season 8 proceeds. The Wild Card round is a sham. Letting the producers judges pick both the eight who deserve another shot and then decide which three would get those spots, seems unfair to the viewers. Especially after the producers judges did such a bad job of selecting the semifinlists to begin with. We're losing interest and enthusiasm for a series that if it hadn't already jumped the shark before this year, definitely did so in 2009. Ugh!

Ryan Seacrest, wearing his serious clothes (a suit) tells us we'll not only learn who the next three finalists are tonight, but also the identities of the Wild Card candidates performing Thursday night. But first we must sit through yet another "how they got here" film recap of the contestants set to David Cook's "A Daily AntheM."

It's time for the Group 3 dance to Katy Perry's "Hot and Cold." Except the only ones standing and "dancing" are the girls, because Scott MacIntyre can't. We don't know whether to be happy or sad about this development. Maybe all future contestants should say they are visually impaired so we can get rid of the results night dance number -- though it is always good for a laugh. Oh, man, the tour's gonna be tons of fun if the whole thing has to be choregraphed planned around what Scott can or can't do. Goodbye catwalks. Needless to say, the number sucks even more than usual, because the contestants all look like they're trapped in some bizarre web, struggling to move while not really moving. The singing? Wow, We forgot to listen we were so focused on the non-dancing.

Watch video of the Group 3 "dance" to Katy Perry's "Hot and Cold"

Next up, highlights of Tuesday's performances. They've subtitled Jorge's Spanish remarks after his happy-teary breakdown. This season is getting stranger and stranger. Before we get the results, Seacrest does standard inane chatting with the contestants. We try to figure out who may have snagged the third-place spot based on who he talks to, but we're still in the dark. Nathaniel says kidding around with the judges the night before didn't bother him, while Jorge explains why a temperature of 78 degrees is freezing. Wanna feel freezing Jorge? Come to the East Coast in winter. Right now, 78 degrees sounds absolutely tropical to us! Felicia is good with her performance from Tuesday. Ju'Not tells us about his developing relationship with the show's medic -- today he received a shot for an asthma attack (on Tuesday he had a cortison shot for his voice). Doesn't he deserve a finalist seat just for all the medical problems? Guess not.

Watch video of the Group 3 contestants chatting with Ryan Seacrest

OK, it's time for the eliminations, and they're gonna happen really fast to make room for the Wild Card selections. Ryan calls Lil Rounds to the stage and, 1,2,3, she's a finalist. No drama (but, hey, who didn't know this was going to happen?) She reprises Mary J. Blige's "Be Without You," and it's not quite as good as Tuesday.

Watch video of Lil Round becoming a finalist and singing "Be Without You"

Ryan is now going to whip through an entire row of the bleachers. He asks Arianna Afsar, Taylor Vaifanua, Alex Wagner-Trugman, Kendall Beard and Scott MacIntyre to stand in place. Ryan says one of this group will become a finalist. If you're in this row and not Scott, you know you're screwed.

Watch video of Scott MacIntyre becoming a finalist, Part 1

One by one, they are dispatched by Ryan, until it's down to *no drama* Kendall and Scott. OMG, what a shock! Scott is the next finalist. We are not happy, but knew it was coming. The season's decline continues for us as Scott sings "Mandolin Rain" again.

Watch video of Kendall Beard being eliminated and Scott MacIntyre becoming a finalist and singing "Mandolin Rain"

Like a host on speed, Ryan is ready to eliminate more contestants, this time in couples. He tells Nathaniel Marshall and Kristen McNamara to stand in place. Kristen seems to have problems understanding this, and starts walking. Ryan stops her. She says she's nervous. She should be. The game is over for both on them. Ryan walks to the opposite side of the top row, and when he asks Von Smith and Felicia Barton to stand, we guess they already know what's coming. They, too, are eliminated.

Watch video of Nathaniel Marshall, Kristen McNamara, Von Smith and Felicia Barton being eliminated

To no one's shock, Jorge Nuñez and Ju'Not Joyner are left. Ryan brings them to the stage and says one of them will get the third finalist spot of the night, right ... and acts as if we'll find out after the commercial break, then says, "now." The two are caught off-guard sure they're going into a commercial break. The one going through is Jorge, who'll have to wait until the end of the show to sing again.

Watch video of Ju'Not Joyner being eliminated and Jorge Nuñez becoming a finalist

It's time for the judges to announce the eight Wild Card choices from the remaining semifinalists sitting in the Red Room holding pen. Simon Cowell tells us this method is [not]fair, how Clay Aiken and Jennifer Hudson would not have gotten through if there had not been a Wild Card system. He also says that one of these picks could win the competition and that the producers judges even changed one of their choices during the last commercial break. And if that's true, how strongly do they feel about any of these picks?

What Simon doesn't say is that if there had not been a Wild Card system in place at the time, it is highly unlikely Aiken and Hudson would have been eliminated in the first place.

The judges take turns announcing the picks, begininning with Randy, followed by Kara, Paula and Simon. And no matter what they say, or do, at this point we're convinced that the producers judges already know who their final three choices are to complete the Top 12. After the selections, almost as an afterthought, Jorge finally gets to sing.

Watch video of the Wild Card selections of Von Smith, Jasmine Murray, Ricky Braddy, Megan Corkrey

Watch video of the Wild Card selections of Tatiana Del Toro, Matt Giraud, Jesse Langseth, Anoop Desai

Next week, the finals begin.

e-mail Idol Addict
© 2009

American Idol Season 8Top 36 Group 3

Simon: I just don't get the shopping thing.
Kara: I mean, I wanna know what she's like.
Simon: I mean shop what? Shoes? Popcorn?
Kara: Wait! I'm trying to see what she's like as a person, personality. Is she bubbly? Is she sweet? I'm not getting that.
Simon: What breakfast cereal do you like?
Randy: Do you like soy milk or regular milk?
Simon: Exactly.

The above exchange during Taylor Vaifanua's review Tuesday night essentially summed up the problem with Season 8 of "American Idol." Why are the judges looking for shallow, superficial qualities -- such as Kara wondering, "What's it like to go shopping with Taylor?" -- instead of just worrying about whether contestants are viable singers? Frankly, we don't give a rat's ass about what it's like to go shopping with anyone. We just want to know if their music is going to move us.

Though Group 3 was far from perfect, as a whole they were much better than Groups 1 and 2. They were mostly -- but not always -- in tune. And if we are going to spend 11 weeks listening to singing, we'd certainly rather listen to the better singers, not just the three fortunate enough to squeak through from each group. What is inherently wrong with the Wild Card system is that better singers in stronger groups lose their shot, while lesser contestants from weaker groups make it through. We'd rather listen to Von Smith, who is doomed unless he grabs a Wild Card slot, than Michael Sarver. And was Felicia Barton dragged back to Hollywood after Joanna Pacitti was disqualified, just so medicore-but-blind Scott MacIntyre or Kris Allen could steal the spot she deserves more than them?

When you let people grow week-by-week and eliminate the ones who receive the least votes, instead of putting through the ones with the most votes, you have a better chance of getting the best mix of singers into the finals.

Plus, the way things are shaping up, the finals will be top heavy with guys. Right now, the count is 4 boys, 2 girls. And it looks as if it will be 6-3 going into the Wild Card round. So unless the judges pick three more women in that round-- which is highly *Anoop Desai* unlikely -- it will be, at best, 7 guys vs. 5 girls.

One interesting note: Many of the song titles seemed to fit the contestants who sang them on Tuesday.

We're the first to admit that we hated Von Smith prior to Tuesday night, and were prepared to turn our nose up once more at the overly dramatic, shouting singer who vaguely resembles Michael Bublé. But guess what (and this is why week-to-week growth is more interesting to watch than a one-shot selection)? He turned us around with his performance of Marvin Gaye's "You're All I Need to Get By" [fitting song title alert]. He toned down the theatrics while at the same time giving the song a contemporary vibe. And, he didn't shout. Although we didn't necessarily agree with Simon Cowell, who said Von was reminiscent of Clay Aiken, we thought it was the best opener thus far. Though we could have lived without the pointy-head hair.

Watch video of Von Smith singing "You're All I Need to Get By" by Marvin Gaye

Any high hopes we had for Taylor Vaifanua after watching her audition in Salt Lake City were dashed with her weak performance of Alicia Keys' "If I Ain't Got You," [fitting song title alert] though we do give her the prize for most-improved post-audition appearance. She's become quite stunning since getting to Hollywood. Unfortunately, the transformation didn't carry over to her voice, which seemed overwhelmed by a song that was bigger than it was. Other than leaving Kara DioGuardi "cold" and wanting to go shopping with her, the judges found Taylor's performance bland and boring. We'd have to agree and throw in pitchy, as well.

Watch video of Taylor Vaifanua singing "If I Ain't Got You" by Alicia Keys

We bestow the "Trainwreck of the Night Award" on Alex Wagner-Trugman, who we previously found gawky, or in his words, "dorky." Brooke White warned you Alex: Don't Google yourself. His rendition of Elton John's "I Guess That Why They Call It the Blues" [fitting song title alert] started out OK, then went totally spastic, both physically and vocally. Alex started doing jerky dance movements, eventually accidentally dropping the mic stand, and added, as Simon said, a "ridiculous growling" element to his singing. Though Alex said he was just trying to have fun, the whole thing came off as comical, and nor in a good way, like Nick Marshall. It went way beyond dorky, all the way to weird. The judges had nary a kind word to say, though Paula Abdul tried to couch the criticism -- and laughter -- with "You certainly are the showman."

Watch video of Alex Wagner-Trugman singing "I Guess That Why They Call It the Blues" by Elton John

Coming in a close second for the trainwreck award was Arianna Afsar, who has a powerhouse voice, but made a hot mess of ABBA's "The Winner Takes It All" [fitting song title/lyrics alert: The winner takes it all/The loser standing small/Beside the victory/That's her destiny]. Trying to put her own spin on the song, her voice went all over the place, as did her tempo: at times was in ahead of the music, other times she was behind it. It sounded as if she had never rehearsed it with the band. Plus, the first half of the song trudged along interminably. When the judges asked her why such as sunny, cute-as-a-button girl would sing a song that was so dark, depressing and dreary (Simon compared the first half to a funeral), Arianna said she knew it was an old song, but she tried to make it contemporary. Cowell put it succinctly: "Well you didn't," adding that it was her "worst performance by a clear mile."

Watch video of Arianna Afsar singing "The Winner Takes It All" by ABBA

Fortunately, the show took an upward turn at this point (hey, it only took four contestants). We had been rooting for Ju'Not Joyner since last season. We think this year is the young father's time to shine. He once again sang the Plain White T's "Hey There Delilah," and was even better than when he sang it in Hollywood. It was his own R&B spin on the song. Ju'Not made it tender and sensitive. He hit a bad note here and there, but overall it was a really nice performance, and we're pulling for him to get that third finalist's spot tonight (there's no stopping the dynamic Lil Rounds or the less-than-dynamic Scott MacIntyre). The judges give him good reviews, with Randy Jackson telling Ju'Not that he loved the way he switched the song up (so did we). Though calling it "a little bit safe," Simon said Ju'Not the performance was better than he thought it was going to be.

Watch video of Ju'Not Joyner singing "Hey There Delilah" by the Plain White T's

Though she has a powerful voice that we never quite expect, something that we can't define about Kristen McNamara has annoyed us since her audition. She puts a not unpleasing spin on Tracy Chapman's "Give Me One Reason" [fitting song title/lyrics alert: Give me one reason to stay here/and I'll turn right back around], but to parrot Kara, the whole thing left us cold. Kara and Paula both praise her voice, but would prefer to hear a song with more of a rock edge, something by Kelly Clarkson or P!nk. Simon and Randy can't figure out who Kristen is (maybe they should go shopping with her :b), with Randy adding that she did too much with the song.

Watch video of Kristen McNamara singing "Give Me One Reason" by Tracy Chapman

Nathaniel Marshall like's to stand out: He has studs in his face, tattoos all over his arms and wears what Simon calls an Olivia Newton-John headband (and who Randy twice refers to as Elton John, duh!). Sadly for Nate, the one thing that doesn't stand out is his voice. Truth be told, we fell asleep during his performance and had to rewind the DVR (OK, we didn't rewind it, we heard enough to know we didn't want to hear the part we missed). His version of Meatloaf's "I'd Do Anything for Love (But I Won't Do That)" [fitting song title alert, even Simon remarked on it] was boring. We kept hearing from the judges and Nathaniel himself that he's a fun guy. So much fun, in fact, that instead of shopping, Kara wants him to be her karaoke partner (doesn't she have any friends?). But we didn't have fun. Whereas Simon called it excruciating, for us it was quite literally a snooze.

Watch video of Nathaniel Marshall singing "I'd Do Anything for Love (But I Won't Do That)" by Meatloaf

So, this is our first time to really get a good listen of Felicia Barton after seeing maybe a 3-second clip of her audition. Know what? She sounds good. In fact, she sounds a lot better than Joanna Pacitti did during her time on "Idol." So the question is: Why the hell didn't Barton make the Top 36? She certainly has a better voice than 80 percent of the women in that group. Did she resemble Pacitti too much to win a spot? It makes no sense. We're impressed with her look (as Kara would say, she's got the whole package) as well as her rendition of Alicia Keys' "No One." Unfortunately, she'll never make it past Lil Rounds tonight, but hopefully the judges will be wise enough to award her a Wild Card slot. She deserves it. The judges pile on the praise, with Paula telling her that her "gift is unbelievable," Randy saying it was hot and Kara saying she had attitude and presence. Only Simon takes a step back from the tongue bath, calling it "a bit copycat."

Watch video of Felicia Barton singing "No One" by Alicia Keys

Scott MacIntyre was probably the contestant most viewers were waiting to hear -- but for all the wrong reasons. Will they continue to love the visually impaired singer? Of course. We were only waiting to see if he was as boring and vanilla as his audition. Guess what? He was. There are many things to admire about MacIntyre, but his vocals aren't one of them. He chose to sing "Mandolin Rain," by Bruce Hornsby and the Range. It's not even a great song when Hornsby does it, and was less so by Scott. He had trouble with some of the notes. The power note at the end was OK, but really, it was too little, too late. The audience applause was way out of proportion with the performance. Randy says it wasn't the most perfect vocal and that there were some problems, but the parts that were great, were really really great. Kara talks about his passion and says, "And when you have issues with the vocal, it doesn't matter, because it's coming from your heart." Paula calls Scott "one of our finest." Simon says he wasn't crazy about the song or lyrics, but that Scott is growing on him because he is beginning to believe in himself and that Scott's the one he'll remember from tonight (why?). Cowell also predicts that Scott will sail through to the next round. Sadly, we're sure he's right.

Watch video of Scott MacIntyre singing "Mandolin Rain" by Bruce Hornsby and The Range

We remember once saying the Beard wasn't a great last name for a female singer, but that was about all we remembered about Kendall Beard. Oh, yes, she was the blonde Texan who was the first contestant to make it through in San Juan. Savvy move, we guess. She's definitely a country singer and proved it with her rendition of "This One's for the Girls" by Martina McBride [fitting song title alert]. It started off better than it ended, getting, as Cowell called it, "a little shrilly at the end," adding that country isn't his cup of tea. Still, Kendell has a decent voice, a nice country vibe and what Paula proclaims is "the best outfit." Randy thinks the song choice was right, even if the vocals weren't her best. Probably doesn't matter. She won't get through tonight. A Wild Card opportunity? Maybe, if only because they want a country artist. Then again, maybe not.

Watch video of Kendall Beard singing "This One's for the Girls" by Martina McBride

The final male slot of the evening goes to Jorge Nuñez. We think the "Idol" producers desperately want a Hispanic in the finals, even possibly as their champion. It's a market they haven't really tapped yet. We are reminded that Kara told Jorge at his audition that he had some trouble with his English pronunciations. Problem fixed! He's been taking diction lessons (Who pays? Him or the show?). The lessons are so successful, there's not even a trace of an accent on Elton John's "Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me" [fitting song title alert]. But the diction is almost too perfect, killing some of the passion in an otherwise very well-sung song. Paula gushes over his hard work and performance, telling him she just wants to squeeze him. Simon tells her to go ahead (she doesn't) then adds, "You heart him, don't you?" Then Simon says, "You know what? I think we were wrong to say to you that you shouldn't sing with an accent, because why should we? You're from Puerto Rico, you've got a good voice, it makes you different. I think you should be who you are. You're actually a very very good singer. And I like the fact that you sound a bit different. I mean, there are, [with a bit of sarcasm] believe it not, Spanish artists who've actually done incredibly well. They have an accent because they're Spanish. Who cares?" Paula then astounds Simon by saying to Jorge, "Will you just speak so we can hear your accent?" Jorge becomes tongue-tied, while Simon looks dumbfounded, rolls his eyes and says "I'm sorry, but that is so patronizing." And he's right. Randy and Kara lavish Jorge with more praise. He tears up. We're angry that he won't claim his rightful spot tonight because of Scott. So there.

Watch video of Jorge Nuñez singing "Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me" by Elton John

The pimp spot goes to Lil Rounds. We liked her in the past, but without the hot passion others have for her. However, Tuesday she did blow us away with Mary J. Blige's "Be Without You." She looked great (though her booty makes J.Lo's look small) and the vocals were spot on. She owned that pimp spot and assured herself a place in the finals. Simon said, "Lil, I'm going to keep this very brief -- brilliant," also telling her "I think you have great, great prospects in this competition. And I think you are, undoubtedly, one of the best singers we have found this year. I like you." The other judges were similarly effusive, with Randy telling her "You kept your swagger on," whatever that means. (We'll have to look it up in our Randy-English dictionary). Paula called her "first class," then cutely added, "I have a sneaking suspicion we're gonna see you for many more lil rounds."

Watch video of Lil Rounds singing "Be Without You" by Mary J. Blige

Who should get a finalist slot tonight: Lil Rounds, Jorge Nuñez, Ju'Not Joyner
Who will get a finalist slot tonight: Lil Rounds, Scott MacIntyre, Ju'Not Joyner

Our ranking of Tuesday's performances, from best to trainwreck:
Lil Rounds
Jorge Nuñez
Ju'Not Joyner
Felicia Barton
Kendall Beard
Scott MacIntyre
Von Smith, Kristen McNamara (tie)
Nathaniel Marshall
Taylor Vaifanua
Arianna Afsar
Alex Wagner-Trugman

e-mail Idol Addict
© 2009

American Idol Season 8Kansas City, Mo. Auditions

Day 2 of Season 8 and we're still liking Idol. David Cook should be liking it, too, as the first hour of the show seemed to be a love letter to him. Yes, we know Kansas City is the most recent Idol's hometown, but we've never seen Idol give so much face time to a former contestant. Of course, they have a stake in Cook's success, so if they sold just one more CD through all the exposure they gave Cook Wednesday night it's just a little more pocket change for 19 Entertainment.

However, we were either really tired and/or these two-hour sessions are just too long, because we started losing it after about 90 minutes and had to keep rewinding the DVR. There were a few auditioners whose voices we liked quite a bit and a couple whose stories made us cry. But then what would American Idol be without emotional manipulation?

Before we even get to the auditions, Jason Castro greets Paula Abdul as she enters the venue and tells her he is there to support his brother, who is trying out. It's no secret that we weren't a big fan of Jason's last season -- with the exception of his "Hallelujah" and "Over the Rainbow" performances, which were outstanding -- and the last thing we want is to sit through another Idol season with another singing Castro.

But something worse than another singing Castro starts the evening, and that is 19-year-old waitress Chelsea Marquardt's Munchkin-like rendition of Nilsson's "I Can’t Live." She can't live? It made us want to commit suicide. She is a cutie, though, and Kara DioGuardi and Paula try to salvage the nastiness of Simon Cowell's "You sounded like what a cat that jumped off the Empire State Building would sound like right before it hit the ground" assessment. The ladies told her she is pretty but that singing is just not for her. Sadly, if she didn't realize that already, she also needs to see an ear specialist. In fact, she leaves the audition room saying her problem was that she picked the wrong song. Riiiiiiiight.

Watch video of Chelsea Marquardt

Ashley Anderson an attractive, tall and lanky singer also has some smarts. Her clever song selection was off Leona Lewis' CD. Lewis is not only a Simon Cowell protege, the song was also (not) coincidentially cowritten by Cowell. Ashley starts off by screwing up the lyrics to "Footprints in the Sand," singing it as footsteps. Simon corrects her, she restarts and gets it right, but stumbles with the same word later on. Because she catches herself the second time, the gaffe is amusing and sweet rather than lethal. Her voice is nothing special, but her saavy song selection gets her through to Hollywood.

Watch video of Ashley Anderson

Casey Carlson is really cute with an elfin face. Simon likes her vibe. She sings Vanessa Carlton's "A Thousand Miles" and Kara tells her she feels there's a whole package. We think package is the operative word here, because Casey's singing, though adequate, is not memorable or outstanding. But with studio enhancement and her looks, she can be packaged into a pop star. It'll be interesting to see whether her voice will carry her past Hollywood week.

Watch video of Casey Carlson

One of the most deluded tryouts from Kansas City was Brian Hettler, who tells us he has an operatically trained voice, but dropped out of school. He has come to the auditions to reclaim his musical destiny. Whenever an auditioner starts out by telling you how great he or she is, you just know that they are going to suck, and Brian did not disappoint in that area. He takes on Aretha Franklin's "Think," which is exactly what he should have done before coming down to audition. He is stunned when Simon tells him everything was wrong, seriously wrong. He then tries to prove he sounds just like Josh Groban. What a surprise! He doesn't. The cameras stalk him outside the audition room. He turns to them and says, "If you're expecting me to cry on camera, don't even try."

Watch video of Brian Hettler

After the commercial break, Ryan Seacrest "runs into" David Cook's mother and stepfather on the street. Another plug for their current Idol king.

Auditioner Von Smith looks natty is his hat and tells us he is not afraid to just be who he is. Those are always suspicious words on Idol. Could go either way. He delivers a loud -- and to our mind -- somewhat unsettling version of "Over the Rainbow." He clearly has a powerful voice, it's what he does with it that's a bit scary. He certainly didn't sing the song in any traditional way and it's unclear from the clip if he can sing in a traditional way. We suspect he can, because Randy Jackson tells him he has a "dope" voice and he receives, much to our surprise, four yesses.

Watch video of Von Smith

One thing you can say about the Castro family is that they take the whole Idol thing very casually. Jason never seemed very invested in practicing or learning lyrics and could barely answer an interview question without screwing up. Michael Castro decided to become a singer 20 days prior to the tryout. He gives a fairly decent performance of Gavin DeGraw's "In Love With a Girl," but it's somewhat galling to see him put through to Hollywood because he is, as Kara says, "ballsy" and not because he possesses a terrific voice (i.e. Simon judges his performance as "goodish"). But put through he is, by all four.

Watch video of Michael Castro

Back from another commercial break, it's time for another bizarro contestant. Cue yellow-suited Vaughn English singing something about "Do you want a banana." They don't even bother showing us a judging segment on him.

Welder Matt Breitzke's looks fit his profession. He's a big guy with a shaved head and goatee. He's also very likable and real. When asked why this change of career, he explains that though he is a bar singer, he has a family to support and just couldn't run off to pursue his singing. He gives a nice rendition of Bill Withers "Ain't No Sunshine" and easily makes it past Kara, Paula and Simon, though Randy thinks he's just a bar singer. But he makes it to Hollywood and we think he was the best audition of the night so far.

Watch video of Matt Breitzke

Next, we suffer through 17-year-old Jasmine "Jazz" Joseph's caterwauling version of "Over the Rainbow." How many times are we going to hear this song sung weirdly tonight? This was bad weird as opposed to Von Smith's allegedly good weird. The producers don't even include any comments from the judges. They just show them staring at Jazz. She exits the room. She never should have entered.

Watch video of Jasmine "Jazz" Joseph

Jessica Furney cares for her 93-year-old grandmother, who can barely hear anymore. Jessica doesn't have a pop (or rock) star appearance, she is actually a bit bookish and nerdy looking. But her big voice delivers Janis Joplin's "Cry Baby" with ease. Hopefully, the Idol wizards can do one of their magical makeovers on her, in the way they transformed Clay Aiken and even David Cook, to make her more marketable. At the least she'll get her shot during Hollywood week.

Watch video of Jessica Furney

Asia McClain (24) and India Morrison (22) are sisters -- obviously their mom liked location names -- who come in to rap for the judges. It is clear that India is the one with the talent and big sister Asia is there for support. Asia is offkey and not very good in her individual audition, while India sails through without a problem. The judges are really impressed with Asia's dedication to her younger sibling, with Simon even remarking that he'd like a sister like her. They exit the audition with a gold ticket for India.

Watch video of Asia McClain and India Morrison

Next up are best friends Jamar Rogers, a 26-year-old bartender from Milwaukee and Danny Gokey, 28, a music teacher from the same city. Jamar goes first and does a big-voice, over-the-top version of the Mamas and Papas' "California Dreaming." He has a decent voice, but the performance is a bit pretentious. Paula says it was good but a bit loud and pitchy, while Kara and Randy think it was over the top. Simon declares it corny but good and Jamar makes it through.

Watch video of Jamar Rogers

Now it's best friend Danny's turn and the producers have been plugging all night that Danny has a tragic story. He does. His wife, Sophia, succumbed to congenital heart disease just four weeks prior to the audition. The producers milk everything they can from the tale and have us in tears. We're rooting for Danny before a note escapes his throat. But he doesn't need our help. His version of Marvin Gaye's "Heard It Through the Grapevine," is soulful and wonderful. Randy calls him "one of the best we've seen" and he becomes our favorite of the night. Interestingly, the producers didn't show any footage of Danny telling his tragic story in front of the judges. It made his success at the audition that much more genuine.

Watch video of Danny Gokey

Simon, of course, screws up the name of Anoop Desai, 21, a student from Chapel Hill, N.C. He also tells him he looks kind of geeky, like he just came out of a meeting with Bill Gates. But his soulful rendition of Boyz II Men's "Thank You" is a pleasant surprise. Anoop tells Randy to call him Anoop-dog, and Randy loves it. We can see that nickname sticking with him if he makes it through Hollywood week.

Watch video of Anoop Desai

Ice-cream server Andrew Lang's performance is preceded by a gimmick, his own two-person cheerleading squad. The look on Simon's face was "this is stupid and annoying," and we agreed. Kara and Paula seemed charmed by it. Yuck. Lang then delivers an overly theatrical version of The Temptations' "My Girl." We think, "Andrew, don't quit your day job." Randy initially gives him a yes, but when Paula wants to hear something more, Andrew goes too over-the-top with "Ain't Too Proud to Beg," and Randy rescinds his "yes" vote. It's all downhill for Andrew after that. BTW Andrew, can we get a large cup of cheesecake and cake batter with Reese's Pieces, please?

Watch video of Andrew Lang

We really like 20-year-old band director Asa Barnes, who has an adorable 4-year-old daughter. He performs Michael Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel," normally a sure ticket to dismissal. But he sang it well and without MJ affectations. The judges still weren't loving the song choice. Simon asked him why he chose that song, and Asa totally wins Cowell over when he unself-consciously says, "Because I like it." It was a nice sentimental moment outside the audition room with his little girl excited for him.

Watch video of Asa Barnes

We knew what type of contestant Michael Nicewonder was going to be as soon as he explained that he was wearing his elementary school singing medal around his neck. He also has really bad teeth. Instead of amused, we get real uncomfortable when Idol decides to exploit people with limited mental abilities. Supposedly related to Hank Williams Jr. (third cousin 1005 times removed?), Michael sings an original song that he says is about his mother. Of course it's dreadful. Pretending that he has a chance, Simon asks if he has a happier song. Michael sings one about his grandmother that sounds the same and is just as bad. The women try to be gentle, but it's almost painful to watch someone this pathetic being publicly ridiculed. Of course, he cries after he fails.

Watch video of Michael Nicewonder

We're on the fence about Dennis Brigham, 19, who does floor maintenance in Glen Carron, Ill. He gives a very enthusiastic and kinda entertaining performance of Chris Brown's "With You," but he's not really a great singer. Paula and Kara inexplicably say "yes," Simon says "no." It's up to Randy, and Dennis, after begging and pleading, obviously convinces Randy to give him another shot, because he greets his family with a gold ticket. Not a good idea.

Watch video of Dennis Brigham

"Janitorial engineer" (talk about euphemisms) Mia Conley waited so long for her audition she fell asleep in the holding room. She attempts Minnie Ripperton's "Loving You," and convinces everyone that they should let sleeping dogs janitorial engineers lie. Certainly her shrieky voice woke us up. She invoked this threat after being rejected, "You guys are wrong and God's gonna make you pay for it." Apparently we had to pay upfront by listening to her sing.

Watch video of Mia Conley

The evening, however, ended on a positive note with Lil Rounds, a customer service rep, who is also a tornado victim from Memphis. Lil and her family are still struggling and live in temporary housing. She enchants the judges with her rendition of Stevie Wonder's "All I Do." Kara and Paula declare their love for her, while Simon deems her fantastic. Randy calls her a cross between Fantasia and Mary J. Blige. The judges are astounded that she doesn't seem to realize just how good she is (shades of Melinda Doolittle). She has major potential and hopefully will sail through Hollywood week as well.

Watch video of Lil Rounds

REMEMBER EMILY WYNNE-HUGHES?

She was the contestant from Phoenix who was willing to sell out her bandmates for a shot at being the American Idol? TMZ reports that Emily is is smack in the middle of a DUI fiasco and she has been ordered to wear a SCRAM bracelet.

The whole thing is over an arrest back in July, when cops busted her for allegedly driving drunk in West Hollywood. Emily copped a plea to a lesser charge of reckless driving. In addition to the bracelet, Emily was placed on three years probation.

TMZ has learned there may be another hearing and the judge could back down on the SCRAM bracelet -- but for now the order stands. TMZ also found and posted pictures from MySpace of Emily baring her bottom, which, nt surprisingly, as has a tattoo on it.













e-mail Idol Addict
© 2009